The increase in sexual power and
the opening of the kundalini passage are simultaneous - not the same, but
simultaneous. The increase in sexual power will be the thrust to open up the
higher centers; so sexual power will increase. If you can be aware of it and not
use it sexually - if you do not allow it to be released sexually - it will
become so intense that the upward movement will begin.
First the energy will try its best to be released sexually, because that is its usual outlet, its usual center. So one must first be aware of one's downward "doors." Only awareness will close them; only non-cooperation will close them. Sex is not so forceful as we feel it to be. It is forceful only momentarily: it is not a twenty-four-hour affair, it is a momentary challenge.
If you can be non-cooperative and aware, it goes. And you will feel more happiness than when sexual energy is released from the downward passage. Conservation of energy is always blissful: wastage of energy is only a relief, it is not blissful. You have unburdened yourself; you have alleviated something that was troubling you. Now you have become unburdened, but you have also become emptied.
The feeling of emptiness that is overtaking the whole Western mind is just because of sexual wastage. Life seems to be empty. Life is never empty, but it seems to be empty because you have been simply unburdening yourself, just relieving yourself. If something is conserved it becomes a richness: if your upward door is open and energy goes upward, not only do you feel relieved, not only is the straining point relieved, but it is not vacant. In a way it is fulfilled; it is overflowing.
The energy has gone upward, but the basic center has not become empty. It is overflowing, and the overflowing energy goes upward, up toward the brahma randhra. Then, near the brahma randhra, there is neither an upward movement nor a downward movement. Now the energy goes to the cosmic: it goes to the all; it goes to the brahman - the ultimate reality. That is why the seventh chakra is known as the brahma randhra - the door to the brahman, the door to the divine. Then there is no "up" and no "down." It will feel like something is penetrating, thrusting upward - and a moment will come when one will feel as though that something is no longer there, that it has gone. Now it is overflowing into the passage.
The petals of the sahasrar are just a symbol for the feelings that occur when energy overflows. The overflowing is a flowering, just like a flower itself is an overflowing. You will feel that something has become a flower; the door is open, and it will go outward.
It will not be felt inwardly; it will be felt outwardly. Something has opened like a flower, like a flower with a thousand petals. It is just a feeling, but the feeling corresponds to the truth. The feeling is a translation and interpretation. The mind cannot conceive of it, but the feeling is just like a flowering. The closest, the nearest thing that we can say is that it is like a bud opening. It is felt like that. That is why we have conceived of the opening of the sahasrar as a thousand-petaled lotus.
So many petals - so many! And they go on opening, they go on opening... the opening is endless. It is a fulfillment; it is a flowering of the human being. Then you become just like a tree, and everything that was in you has flowered.
Then all you can do is to offer this flower to the divine.
We have been offering flowers, but they are broken flowers. Only this flower can be a real offering.